Posts Tagged ‘happiness’

One is a Whole Number

October 10, 2012

In memory of Nancy Oberlin Bestwick and Dr. David Hawkins

In this interconnected universe, every improvement we make in our private world improves the world at large for everyone.  We all float on the collective level of consciousness of mankind, so that any increment we add comes back to us.  We all add to our common buoyancy by our efforts to benefit life.  It is a scientific fact that what is good for you is good for me.”  ~Dr. David Hawkins

A couple months before my Dad passed away from cancer in 2007, he said something to me I will never forget.  One night as we sat in the living room of the house I grew up in, he looked over at me and said, “I hope when I die I am alone.  I don’t want anyone to remember me dying…I want them to remember me living.”

There are certain points on “the journey of life” that are meant to be walked alone.  Which points?  We are not made privy to that information, but when the time comes, we know it.  It may be after the loss of a loved one, at your own death, after a divorce, after a job loss, after recovery from an addiction or even before a significant yet unknown event is supposed to occur in your life.  Regardless, being alone is mandatory.  For some journeys God gives you only one seat.

Being alone is one of the biggest lessons we can learn as humans.  Being alone is not easy…it is tough.  You are left alone with YOU.  No distractions, no one to get another opinion from, no one to tell you the “right” thing to do…no one.  Feelings arise that come out of nowhere.  Feelings of fear, loneliness, despair, or anxiety.  Yes, at times we all enjoy being alone – self-time if you will – but being alone when you don’t necessarily want to be, now that is where true lessons are born.

To appreciate anything in life we must experience polarities.  In order to know you like the company of others, you must have been alone at some time.  To know happiness you must also at one time had to know sadness.  The opposite of something is a part of that something – its opposite makes it whole.  In order to be “whole,” we must savor each experience AND it’s opposite.  A whole breath includes the inhale and the exhale…without either one, there would be no wholeness of breath.

One of the greatest illusions we have is that of individuality.  According to Dr. David Hawkins in his brilliant book, “Power vs. Force,” “the illusion of individuality is the origin of all suffering – when one realizes that one IS the universe, complete and at one with all that is, forever without end, then no further suffering is possible.”

The individual that is YOU has a very unique purpose.  You must have the entire experience of being human, which includes time alone, to learn, recapitulate events, reflect, pray and experience the wholeness of your soul being incarnated into this beautiful human body.  If you find yourself alone now, as I do, don’t allow yourself to give into the feelings of loneliness.  You are far from alone.  Each moment is as it is meant to be.  Savor it for what it is and allow the feelings and the experience to take you to places of this human experience you have not known before.  Learn from it, love it and above all, love yourself.  You are the only one that will ever always be there for you.  Others come and go…you stay.  Be the best you that you can possibly be and use your alone time to sharpen the blade, oil the engine and give yourself a needed tune-up.  Sleep, study, read, observe, pray, meditate, walk, experience the beauty of nature, reflect, work, don’t work, sing, dance, paint, sculpt, cry, laugh, run, take a bath, do absolutely nothing.

Whatever you do, as you find yourself alone, remember…one is a whole number.
(Thanks Nancy!)

“It’s my contention that the universe not only will, but must provide you with what you conceive of.  So if you complain about what is missing from your life – you will be offered experiences that match that energy.”  ~Dr. Wayne Dyer

Love you,

Chris

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Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and .

 

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Lose Balance=Lose Power

September 28, 2012

No matter how far you have gone wrong, you can always turn around.

Balance is a myth.  Yes, you heard me correctly.  It is a myth…at least a myth in the way you think of balance.  Most believe balance is an even 50/50 split of work and home life.  Last time I checked, there were many other things that made up a person’s life besides home and work; social activities, spirituality, physical and mental health, etc.  If you are doing one thing and thinking you should be doing another thing…that is a sure sign you are “out of balance.”

There are many reasons why we lose balance in our lives.  Too much on our plates, doing what others think we should do rather than what we want to do, letting negative thoughts about the “what ifs” take you over…but the number one reason we lose balance is because we have lost power to something or someone.  Losing power equates to a loss in feeling good.  When you feel any one of a number of “bad” feelings, somewhere you have lost power.  Power can be lost to a person, a thing, a place, or a thought.  The good news is that once you are aware that you have lost power you can call it back by regaining the balance in your life.

How do you regain balance?  If that isn’t the golden question, I don’t know what is!  Balance comes back into alignment when you identify what is important in your life at this moment (your priorities) and you spend your time and energy doing those things.  We lose balance when we are spending our time on things that we do not feel are important to us at the moment…necessary maybe, but not “important.”  Let me define “important” here; important equates to a thing or a person you feel is worthy of your time that when you give your energy to, it makes you feel fulfilled and satisfied inside.

What is important to you today may not be as important to you in a month.  Things and people change.  You change.  Change is the only constant we have in life.  Get used to it.  Every month revisit the priorities in your life and not only make sure they are the same, but assess your behaviors and make sure they are a match to those priorities.

What are your top priorities right now?  Not your “to do” list…put that away.  I want to see your backbone here, not your wishbone!  What makes your heart skip a beat when you think about it?  What area of your life is in the most turmoil right now?  Where in your life do you often get confused and feel as if you never make the right decision?  These answers are a clue to the direction in which the Universe is pointing you.  Use your feelings as a guide.  Where are your feelings guiding you?  What feels good when you do it?  What thoughts consume your attention all day long?

Take some time to write down your top three priorities and then create balance in your life by aligning your actions to those priorities.  When your feelings drop, realize you lost power and call it back by doing something that will make you feel good again.

Know today that you deserve to have a balanced life.  It is ok to have and experience good things.  There is no need to feel guilty because you have something someone else does not.  We are all on our own journeys.  We walk the same road but we are all on different mile markers.  Some are ahead and some are behind.  Those ahead are not “better” and those behind are not “slower.”  We are at the exact mile marker we should be.  When you get lost on the road of life, pull over (rest), look at your map (your priorities), turn around if you need to (set different priorities) and get back on the road (re-engage in life –  take action).

Remember…we are all walking on the same road.  Make it a good “road trip.” 😉

Once you become aware of something that is limiting you, you then have the power to change it.

Calling back my power,

Chris

To sign up for Chris’ Blog go to www.ChrisSopa.Wordpress.com.

Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and .

25 Things You Can Do To Alleviate Stress

August 14, 2012

I am about to make a bold statement…stress is the main and only cause of all illnesses!  Everything we experience in our physical world is simply a projection of what we are allowing to run through our minds.  Our thoughts create our reality.  If your thoughts are “sick,” you will be sick.

We all know people who are wonderful individuals who are very positive and have great lives but still get ill.  How can this be?  Our conscious mind may be positive, but our subconscious mind runs 90% of our behaviors.  We are not always aware what sits in that deep recess of the mind.  One of the ways God gets our attention, if all else fails, is through our physical body.  A physical ailment will stop you in your tracks every time and cause you to question your life, your thinking and your actions.

If you do nothing else for yourself in this lifetime, do this:  learn how to manage stress in your life.  Contrary to what you may now believe, stress is not caused by your ex, your boss, lack of money, lack of sex, having no job, etc.  Stress is caused by your perception of those events in your life.  Change your perception and you change the “movie.”

Here are 25 things off the top of my head I have done in the past to alleviate stress.  Feel free to leave comments and add to the list.  Let’s all help each other!

  1. Close your eyes and take 3 deep diaphragmatic breaths (push your stomach out when you inhale) – breath always brings you directly back to your soul.
  2. Move your body – walk, bike, run, stretch, jump on a trampoline, etc.
  3. Sing a song (out loud – hey, if I can do it with my voice, so can you!)
  4. Smile – you actually use more muscles to frown than to smile.
  5. Listen to your favorite song or some relaxing music.
  6. Eat more greens (spinach, kale, and arugula) – greens are very grounding and balancing.
  7. Meditate or pray – worry is a form of prayer, so create thoughts that are more of what you want to see in your life, not what you are worried may happen.
  8. Sleep – this is not overrated!  We need sleep to recharge and we also get much of our spiritual guidance through our sleeping dreams.
  9. Close your eyes and visualize being in your favorite place – feel the joy of being there.
  10. Go out in nature – nature is a natural balancer of energy.
  11. Get away from your source of stress whether it is a person, place or thing.
  12. Light a candle – light is healing and is often used to clear out and protect energy.
  13. Take a bath – essential oils such as lavender are great!
  14. Peel an orange and smell the rind – citrus smells are a great stress reliever.
  15. Choose fruit instead of a sugary treat – sugar tends to aggravate stress and is thought to be a cause of depression.
  16. Clean something – it is truly cathartic.
  17. Lie down, spread your arms and legs out and just breathe for 10 minutes.
  18. Get near running water – the sound is very soothing and healing.  Wash your hands up to your elbows.  Toxins collect in the forearms.
  19. Garden – pick some fresh flowers, weed, or plant something new in your garden.
  20. Pet your cat or dog.  Pets actually absorb negative energy to protect us.
  21. Organize yourself (a drawer, desk, etc.) – feeling organized makes you feel less stressed.
  22. Drink a glass of water – water is cleansing and purifying to the soul and to your physical body.
  23. Drink a cup of hot tea – peppermint and chamomile are the best.
  24. Avoid gossip and negative people – walk away, change the subject of conversation, avoid certain places, etc.
  25. Remember that you are in control of you.  80% of the thoughts you have on a daily basis are lies that come from your past conditioning.  Always question your thoughts.  You cannot believe everything you think.

Faith is the power to stand up to the madness and chaos of the physical world while holding the position that nothing external has any authority over what heaven has in mind for you.” ~Caroline Myss

Desserts…desert…I always get confused!  Lol!

Chris

To sign up for Chris’ Blog go to www.ChrisSopa.Wordpress.com.

Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and .

“Life is Like a Box of Chocolates” (or Hot Chocolate in this case!)

July 26, 2012

It makes no difference how many peaks you reach if there was no pleasure in the climb”.
~Oprah Winfrey

A group of graduates, well established in their careers, were talking at a reunion and decided to go visit their old university professor, now retired.  During their visit, the conversation turned to complaints about stress in their work and lives.  Offering his guest hot chocolate, the professor went into the kitchen and returned with a large pot of hot chocolate and an assortment of cups – porcelain, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite – telling them to help themselves to the hot chocolate.

When they all had a cup of hot chocolate in hand, the professor said, “Notice that all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones.  While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.  The cup that you are drinking from adds nothing to the quality of the hot chocolate.  In most cases it even hides what we drink.  What all of you really wanted was hot chocolate, not the cup; but you consciously went for the best cups…and then you began eyeing each other’s cups.

Now consider this:  Life is the hot chocolate; your job, money and position in society are the cups.  They are just tools to hold and contain life.  The cup you have does not define, nor change the quality of life you have.  Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the hot chocolate.  God makes the hot chocolate, man chooses the cups.  The happiest people don’t have the best of everything.  They just make the best of everything they have.

Live simply.
Love generously.
Care deeply.
Speak kindly.
Enjoy your hot chocolate.

Enjoying every sip,

Chris

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To sign up for Chris’ Blog go to www.ChrisSopa.Wordpress.com.

Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and .


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