Who Are You?

October 3, 2012

Close your eyes and take a deep breath.  Remember back to when you were five years old.  What did you want to be when you grew up?  At five years old, you had no mental limitations.  No wounds.  No thoughts of why you couldn’t become what you wanted to become.  Then it happened…you grew up and got older.  With that came disappointments and heartache, and you slowly forgot your dreams.

Why do you believe what you do?  Have you ever taken an inventory of what you believe and asked yourself, “Is that mine?”  Many of our beliefs are not even ours.  They are hand-me-downs from our parents, society, friends and religion.  Isn’t it time to clean house and decide what it is you believe?  If not now, when?

Your beliefs are the very things that keep you from becoming what you are meant to become…from living your dreams.  The only thing in the way of you is you.  Your thoughts dictate your feelings and your feelings dictate your actions.  Those hurtful thoughts you keep reliving in your mind, they are only thoughts.  The event is over.  The more you put your attention on a thought the more your amazing subconscious mind thinks it is real…it thinks it is happening again!  It does not know any better.  You are its master.  It lives out the orders you give it.  The orders are your beliefs and your thoughts.

Take a few moments and write down the ideal life you want to live.  Stop worrying how it could possibly come to pass.  The Universe takes care of that one.  Just write it down and don’t hold back.  Go wild and describe in detail your perfect mate, your perfect job, the perfect place you want to live, how your perfect body looks…what is your perfection?

I have my coaching clients do something called “journaling from the end.”  Take a situation in your life that you would like to change, think of the ideal way you would like it to turn out and write about that scenario as if it has already come to pass.  Writing it down makes it happen…it gives your dreams power by passing the information through the act of writing to the subconscious mind.  (A great book on this is “Write it Down, Make it Happen:  Knowing What You Want and Getting it,” by Henriette Anne Klauser.)

Answer the question, “Who am I?”  That’s a hard one but I know you can do it.  Starting today, create the life you want to live.  Claim it on paper then bring it to pass in your world.  Life is not a process of discovery…it is a process of creation.  Create one worthy of you and your greatness.

I am….


To sign up for Chris’ Blog go to www.ChrisSopa.Wordpress.com.

Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and .


It’s My Turn

October 1, 2012

It’s my turn to live.
It’s my turn to feel my feelings.
It’s my turn to speak my truth.
It’s my turn to rest.
It’s my turn to let my light shine.
It’s my turn to see the joy and beauty in everything around me.
It’s my turn to make the choices I want to make without permission.
It’s my turn to show how strong I am.
It’s my turn to pray and believe my prayers will be answered.
It’s my turn to change my mind when I want to change it.
It’s my turn to take care of me and not everybody else.
It’s my turn to be surrounded by people who are honest and trustworthy.
It’s my turn to be alone and savor my own company without feeling lonely.
It’s my turn to remember my Divinity and why I am here.
It’s my turn to live up to my Divine potential.
It’s my turn to cry, laugh and yell with everything I’ve got.
It’s my turn to save myself.
It’s my turn to open my heart.
It’s my turn to love.
It’s my turn to live.

Now it’s your turn,


To sign up for Chris’ Blog go to www.ChrisSopa.Wordpress.com.

Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and .

Lose Balance=Lose Power

September 28, 2012

No matter how far you have gone wrong, you can always turn around.

Balance is a myth.  Yes, you heard me correctly.  It is a myth…at least a myth in the way you think of balance.  Most believe balance is an even 50/50 split of work and home life.  Last time I checked, there were many other things that made up a person’s life besides home and work; social activities, spirituality, physical and mental health, etc.  If you are doing one thing and thinking you should be doing another thing…that is a sure sign you are “out of balance.”

There are many reasons why we lose balance in our lives.  Too much on our plates, doing what others think we should do rather than what we want to do, letting negative thoughts about the “what ifs” take you over…but the number one reason we lose balance is because we have lost power to something or someone.  Losing power equates to a loss in feeling good.  When you feel any one of a number of “bad” feelings, somewhere you have lost power.  Power can be lost to a person, a thing, a place, or a thought.  The good news is that once you are aware that you have lost power you can call it back by regaining the balance in your life.

How do you regain balance?  If that isn’t the golden question, I don’t know what is!  Balance comes back into alignment when you identify what is important in your life at this moment (your priorities) and you spend your time and energy doing those things.  We lose balance when we are spending our time on things that we do not feel are important to us at the moment…necessary maybe, but not “important.”  Let me define “important” here; important equates to a thing or a person you feel is worthy of your time that when you give your energy to, it makes you feel fulfilled and satisfied inside.

What is important to you today may not be as important to you in a month.  Things and people change.  You change.  Change is the only constant we have in life.  Get used to it.  Every month revisit the priorities in your life and not only make sure they are the same, but assess your behaviors and make sure they are a match to those priorities.

What are your top priorities right now?  Not your “to do” list…put that away.  I want to see your backbone here, not your wishbone!  What makes your heart skip a beat when you think about it?  What area of your life is in the most turmoil right now?  Where in your life do you often get confused and feel as if you never make the right decision?  These answers are a clue to the direction in which the Universe is pointing you.  Use your feelings as a guide.  Where are your feelings guiding you?  What feels good when you do it?  What thoughts consume your attention all day long?

Take some time to write down your top three priorities and then create balance in your life by aligning your actions to those priorities.  When your feelings drop, realize you lost power and call it back by doing something that will make you feel good again.

Know today that you deserve to have a balanced life.  It is ok to have and experience good things.  There is no need to feel guilty because you have something someone else does not.  We are all on our own journeys.  We walk the same road but we are all on different mile markers.  Some are ahead and some are behind.  Those ahead are not “better” and those behind are not “slower.”  We are at the exact mile marker we should be.  When you get lost on the road of life, pull over (rest), look at your map (your priorities), turn around if you need to (set different priorities) and get back on the road (re-engage in life –  take action).

Remember…we are all walking on the same road.  Make it a good “road trip.” 😉

Once you become aware of something that is limiting you, you then have the power to change it.

Calling back my power,


To sign up for Chris’ Blog go to www.ChrisSopa.Wordpress.com.

Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and .

The 2%

September 26, 2012

Do not allow the distractions of your day, your body, and your thoughts to own you. Step outside of the body and observe it as a vehicle that you instruct, a vehicle that transports you through time and space and documents experience. When you have a thought of someone who has passed into spirit, you are with them. When you hold a thought of disease, you start to become it. When you have a thought of limitation, you are gifted it. Where your thoughts are is where you dwell, it is your creational address. This address then becomes your quantified universe and defined field of light. Redefine who you are to yourself and then it will follow as the day follows the night that you will be re-defined in every cell of your body, and level of your life.  Do not be humbled by your own light, for it is grander than you can conceive. That is your Divine Right and your Divine Inheritance. All things belong unto you.”  ~Rev. Angela Peregoff

There was a study done recently on goal-setting.  100 people were asked if they had goals for their life and out of that 100, only 10 people said yes that they had goals.  After following those 10 goal-making individuals, they found that only 2% of them actually went on to achieve their goals.  What was different about that 2%?  Why did they go on to achieve their goals but the other 8 did not?

I travel all over the world and have spoken to many different types of audiences.  I have facilitated lectures to CEO’s all the way to upcoming female leaders in Gambia, Africa that could not read, write or speak English.  One thing I find in common with all of my audiences is that when I ask the question, “Who in here knows what they want?  Who has goals for their life?” I get the deer in the headlights look.  A few stragglers raise their hands (that 2%), but the others act as if I just asked them a question in Swahili.  It still to this day puzzles me as to how any of these individuals make decisions in their life not knowing what they want?

One myth many seem to believe is that life just happens and our job is to respond to life in the appropriate way.  That could not be further from the truth.  That is like saying you are a pinball in a pinball machine getting knocked around this way and that by life and you just have to take it.  I choose to believe something different.  I choose to believe that creating our life the way WE want is a God-given right.  We are the Michael Angelo’s of our lives…we are the creators.

What is different about that 2% who go on to be creators of their lives?

  1. They take the time to define their priorities – what are your top three priorities in your life right now…in order?  Family, career, physical health?  There is no wrong answer.  If you do not know what your priorities are, everything, my friends, becomes a priority!  Priorities shift and change as you change.  Define them today and revisit them often.
  2. Their behaviors match their word – once you have identified your priorities, make sure your behaviors match what you say.  That is called self-integrity.  If I were a fly and followed you around all day long, at the end of the day, I should be able to tell you what your priorities are by watching your behaviors.  If your behaviors are not in line now, make adjustments.
  3. They define very specifically what they want – make a bucket list of things you would like to do, have or accomplish before you “kick the bucket.”  Be as specific as you can (color, place, time).  Do not worry about how what you identified will come to pass, just write it down.  If it pops into your mind, it goes on the paper.
  4. They have a plan of action – take the top 3 items on your bucket list and make a plan of action – dates and all.  Identify what you need to do, piece by piece, to accomplish this goal.  Work backwards from the end point to today.  Have the self-discipline to stick with it.  Ask yourself why you want this goal so bad and if you want it so bad, why haven’t you achieved it yet?  Make a plan of how to overcome these obstacles before they arrive.
  5. They have an undying belief in themselves and see their goal as already accomplished – the old adage of seeing it before you believe it has really thrown a glitch into the thinking of many individuals in achieving their goals.  The true equation of manifesting what you desire is to BELIEVE IT, DO IT, HAVE IT.  You must believe a thing is true first in order to act accordingly. Your believing begins with your thoughts:  your conditioning leads to a thought; every thought leads to a feeling; every feeling leads to an action and this equals your end result.  Change your thinking and change your life (there is a great book with that as the subtitle coming out in 2 weeks!  Stay tuned… J)

Starting today, begin to believe you have the right to life; the right to live that life the way YOU want to.  Go grab a “paintbrush” and start your masterpiece.

One of the 2%,


To sign up for Chris’ Blog go to www.ChrisSopa.Wordpress.com.

Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and .


September 24, 2012

Beginning this week, the “Journey Back to Self” blog will be published on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays only.  All three blogs will be written by me unless otherwise noted in the blog.  Thank you SO MUCH for being a regular reader!

I had the distinct pleasure this week of being one of the speakers at a Women’s Leadership Forum in Philadelphia.  Being the closing speaker, I was honored to sit through the entire day and listen to the three amazing women who were guest speakers as well at the forum.  I always find it interesting that, because I am a public speaker, writer and coach, people seem to think I have all of the answers and my life is perfect.  I’d like to think that as well but the reality is that I am on this journey the same as you.  I learn from my experiences, continue to grow from them and every day do what I feel is right for me to become the best human being possible during my life this go round.  I strive for excellence, not perfection – which is a HUGE admission for a recovering perfectionist!

All of the women who spoke at this forum were fabulous but my ah-ha moment came from my dear friend, Joan Walsh.  Joan and I have known each other for probably 10 years now and quite often speak in the same circles.  Joan, being one of the most goal-oriented and successful women I know, suffered an almost fatal aneurysm 20 months ago.  In her workshop, she discussed her healing journey and, although she is still healing, what it has taken for her to get this far.

One of the areas where Joan is brilliant is in the area of goal setting and coming up with a plan of action.  In doing her research, one of the things she found out regarding healing from a brain injury is the importance of sleep.  Due to the fact that healing is Joan’s number one priority, she made the decision to only work in the mornings and in the afternoons she goes home to take a nap.  She honors herself and her goals enough to do what she needs to do to accomplish what she has determined will be so in her life.

Hearing this tidbit of information is what brought me to my ah-ha moment.  My tendency in life is to “get ‘er done!”  I, being goal-oriented myself, like to act, check it off of my list and move on.  This tendency, although effective in getting me to my end point, does not always honor my soul nor do I always feel great once I get to my desired end point.  I sacrifice too much of myself and I tend to make decisions quickly in order to just to get it over with rather than thinking my decisions through and being patient with allowing the things that I feel need to change work themselves out organically.

My dear friend Sarah has a great way of making sure she is conscious in every decision she makes.  She lives by the rule that when you have to make a decision, never do so if you are Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired (in other words, if any of these four scenarios is what you are experiencing at the moment, HALT and hold off making that decision).

My life in 2012 has been one in which it seems one tornado after another is taking turns whipping through each area of my life.  Just when I seem to settle into my life after a major change, something else seems to come up right on the heals of that ending that throws me into another cycle of change.  The Universe is currently “cleaning house,” so to speak, in everyone’s life this year.  We need to release the old ways of doing things that no longer serve us in order to make room for the new to enter.  All of these changes we are experiencing are to make us aware of where we need to change in our personal lives.  What decision making patterns no longer work; what relationships no longer serve us; what career is no longer doing it for fulfilling our soul.  You name it…it is coming up!

We cannot control the circumstances that life throws our way but we can always control how we respond to them.  One of our God-given rights on this Earth is to experience joy.  That joy is a decision.  There is no need to wait for the outside circumstances of your life to be perfect in order to be happy and feel joyful.  (The way this year is going for everyone, if we depended on external circumstances to be happy, we’d be waiting awhile!)  Decide how you want to feel today and do what you need to do to make it so.  Stay in your center, be consciously aware of how you feel (remember H.A.L.T.), stop worrying about what others think and their reactions and step forward into the life that has been waiting for you.  Honor yourself and make decisions that serve your well-being and happiness.  It is ok to be in the equation when you make decisions about your life.  It’s about time, actually, that you are.

Your life is there…you just have to choose to live it.

H.Y.D.I.F.W.J. (Hoping Your Day Is Filled With Joy),


To sign up for Chris’ Blog go to www.ChrisSopa.Wordpress.com.

Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and .

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